47 Life Lessons – Business and Personal
I celebrated my birthday this week and I thought I’d share with you 47 lessons I have learned in life. Some are business lessons and some are personal lessons. They all have impacted my life in a profound way:
1. What people say about you, says more about them than you.
2. When you learn to quiet your mind and manage your thoughts, you will then begin to know yourself.
3. Praise publicly. Hash out issues in private.
4. When leading or helping someone find their answers, it’s important to lead them back to themselves.
5. Never accuse. Always give people the benefit of the doubt.
6. You can’t grow if you are not willing to step out of your comfort zone.
7. Laughter is medicine.
8. Have an insatiable curiousness about the world.
9. People matter more than things.
10. Always set clear expectations and understand what is expected from all parties before signing on the dotted line.
11. Don’t invest in something you don’t understand.
12. If it comes in wrapping with a bunch of words that are hard to pronounce, it’s most likely not a healthy food choice.
13. Take responsibility for the choices you have made in your life.
14. Ignore your naysayers.
15. Surround yourself with people who support your vision, dreams, and goals.
16. Insanity is defined as doing the same thing over and over and expecting different results.
17. Change is constant.
18. Never make a hasty decision when it comes to business. Always read the fine print.
19. There are always two sides to every story.
20. Understand how your target audience thinks and how they make purchasing decisions.
21. Our thoughts determine the outcome of our lives.
22. Focus on people’s good qualities.
23. Be a problem solver, not a complainer.
24. Don’t blame, judge, or criticize.
25. Don’t let your ego get in the way of doing the right thing.
26. Relinquish the thoughts that no longer serve you.
27. Give without expecting anything in return.
28. You can’t control how others think and behave.
29. You must be the change you wish to see in the world.
30. Just because that’s how it has always been done, doesn’t mean that’s how it should continue to be done.
31. Be inclusive, not exclusive.
32. Ask not what others can do for you, but what you can do for them.
33. Set healthy boundaries in relationships.
34. Dance wildly. Sing out loud. Hug humans.
35. Lift others up and promote their work.
36. Stay Human.
37. Feel grass blades on your feet and the sun on your skin.
38. Take time to do NOTHING.
39. Step into your POWER.
40. Be present. Yesterday is gone. Tomorrow has not arrived.
41. Look deeply into the eyes of your pet dog or cat and connect with them.
42. Be humble. Be grateful.
43. Plant. Grow an organic vegetable garden.
44. Ask the question: What are my intentions?
45. Hug a TREE and feel the energy of Mother Earth pulsate through your body.
46. Just because you don’t understand something does not mean you need to be afraid of it. Ask questions.
47. Forgive yourself.
Feel free to add some of your favorite Life Lessons in the comments below!
Envision Plan Act Track Adapt
Here is a 5 step social media marketing plan presentation I put together for my local business community. Feel free to share it with others by posting it on Facebook and re-tweeting it, etc. I would love your feedback and comments below. Thanks!
Hware’s Top Picks: Some Old, Some New, Some May Surprise You.
As an online business training and coaching company, people often want to know where we go for our business resources and who we turn to for advice, tips, and strategies. While we have been offering business and technology consulting services for over 25 years, we believe in the importance of being students of life. That means that we never stop learning. We have a huge library of online resources, personalities, brands, and strategic organizations that we tap into daily and weekly. It was hard to narrow it down, but we finally came up with the BEST websites to help you build your small business. So grab your favorite drink and check out the top 15 websites that made the cut! Please leave your comments below and let us know what you think:
- Altimeter group: A research-based advisory firm. This is where I go to get a lot of data driven info on business strategies.
- Chris Brogan: If I had to pick one industry expert on social media and business. It would be Chris Brogan. His book, Trust Agents is a must-read!
- CopyBlogger: Copywriting tips for online marketing success. This site has a ton of valuable FREE resources and tips on blog writing.
- Gena Livings: For inspired living. My dear friend, Gena Livings is changing the world with her lifestyle modification services. Be sure to download her free e-book. It’s inspiring!
- Green Festivals: If you are a “Green” business who sells B2C, you cannot afford to not be an exhibitor at this event. Co-founded by my good friend, Kevin Danaher, Green Festivals is on the leading-edge of bringing all things “Green” to the mainstream. Four events are held throughout the year in Washington DC, Chicago, Seattle, and San Francisco. We have been attending since the first Green Festival and this event just keeps getting better every year, especially the after parties!
- Mashable: The most popular Social Media News blogs on the internet. Take your time absorbing the information, it can be overwhelming for newbies. You will want to bookmark a lot of the material and use it as a reference later.
- Michael Franti & Spearhead: (Okay, this has very little to do with growing your biz online, but I could not resist plugging my fave band. I fire up this music to keep me motivated and inspired for my biz.) As entrepreneurs, we all need music to keep us motivated, inspired, and happy! We LOVE to dance to Spearhead music! If you ever have the chance to see a live Michael Franti and Spearhead concert, you must GO! It’s life altering! What’s your favorite music that keeps you going?
- Mixergy: Andrew Warner interviews CEOs and Founders of successful companies . I love his in-depth questions of business leaders. He is young and bold and he asks really good questions. I love to go hiking on my property while listening to Mixergy interviews on my iPhone. I always learn something new from this twenty something year old.
- Read Write Web: This is a technology analysis news blog. I like referencing this site because while the focus is on technology, the writing is not filled with Geek and Coder jargon. It’s written for people like us ordinary folks.
- Seth Godin: One of the top marketers in the world. I have read many of his books and have had the opportunity to see him speak live. He has a way of making his point very succinctly.
- Small Biz Survival: A rural and small business resource blog. We live in a rural area in northern California, and while our business is internet and technology-based, we are nevertheless interested in what’s happening in small town businesses.
- Small Business Trends: An online news blog with a focus on small businesses trends and over 122,000 subscribers.
- Social Media Examiner: A guide to social media. This site has a lot of useful “How To” articles on social media, well written content and easy-to-understand.
- Triple Pundit: As many of you know, our personal lifestyle is oriented towards most things “Green” and “Sustainable.” We did build a straw bale home many years ago and enjoy living in it. Triple Pundit is a great online “Green” business news resource.
- Work Awesome: A resource for the worker on productivity, time management and all kinds of other awesome stuff. I recently found this site and I can’t say enough awesome things about it!
I hope you found great value in our top 15 BEST websites to help you grow your small business. We invite you to add some of your favorite small business websites too, even if it is your own and you feel it will help a small business owner. Don’t be shy! Go ahead and post!
The San Francisco Small Business Week conference was held last week and the City by the Bay did not disappoint! As a resource and advocate for small businesses, I want to share with you some fun and fascinating highlights of the event.
The FREE workshops and networking events should become a model for small business conferences. Edith Yeung of BizTechDay gave a workshop on “How to Engage or Build a Community for Your Business.” No one knows better than Edith on how to bring small business owners together. She is the founder of the largest Small Business MeetUp group in San Francisco called SF Entrepreneur. I spoke with Edith after her workshop and she invited me to attend the Women Innovators reception held later that evening at the Julia Morgan Ballroom where the First Lady of San Francisco, Jennifer Siebel Newsom was hosting a panel discussion on women leaders. Jennifer is currently working on a film called MissRepresentation. The film explores the underrepresentation of women in positions of power and influence in America and how the media plays a role in perpetuating negative images of women. The trailer for the film left me sitting on the edge of my seat. As a business woman myself and one who understands the value of having strong female role models in a girl’s life, I was most intrigued by this upcoming film and look forward to watching it upon its release.
The business after hours Grand Expo 2010 was held at the AT&T Park Club level and what a perfect venue to host a party! The stunning views of the Bay set the tone for a fabulous festive evening of networking. While noshing our way through all the hors d’ oeuvres and sipping on California wines, I came across BLineMarketing, an all inclusive marketing firm that offers internet marketing services. Brooke Spilberg, director of search marketing for BLineMarketing is a wealth of knowledge and expertise on growing your business online.
Later that evening, I made a short visit to Mashable’s MashMeet SF at the Roe Lounge where I met up with Pete Cashmore and friends. The hip and trendy lounge was over flowing with tech-lovers of all sorts by the time I arrived. Of course, what’s an evening out in San Francisco without saying good-night to my long-time friends, world renown chef, Roland Passot and his sommelier brother, George Passot of La Folie French restaurant?
Check out more photos of The San Francisco Small Business Week Conference and Mashable’s MashMeetup SF party at Brenda Horton’s Flickr site.
Unless They Are Integrated Into the Business Plan
A few days ago I attended a town hall meeting in my rural community hosted by the local Chamber of Commerce. The purpose was to get feedback from local businesses so that the chamber can formulate a strategic plan. It was a ‘gather-the-information’ type of meeting. I am not a member of the local chamber and I must confess that I am not involved with our local business community as much as I would like to. Mainly because my own business (Hware) has more of an e-commerce focus and I live/work about 30 minutes from the downtown business area. However, I happened to be in town before the meeting and the topic was of particular interest to me, so I stopped by and joined the two hour session. It was a room filled to capacity with many concerned small business owners.
Social Media is One Piece of a Marketing Model
Frankly, I don’t know much about the folks running the chamber or the board of directors, but I do know this. Business as we have come to know it has CHANGED! Technology has always led the way in changing the way we do business. The personal computer revolutionized our business world as did the internet. The current technology revolution is social media. Social media tools are mostly FREE today. There is however, speculation that FREE may no longer be. What is key to the success of the chamber, among many other things, is a social media plan that is cohesively tied to the chamber’s business plan and integrated into their strategic plan. Strategic planning is extremely useful for long-term goals, however the problem with most strategic plans is that once they are done, they tend to get shelved and rarely referenced. That is why it is critical to integrate a strategic plan into a business plan and then show details how the marketing model, revenue model, operations model, etc., supports those plans. Social media falls under the category of marketing. The chamber is the voice of the local business community. It is there to serve the local business community and it should do so with the use of the latest and most cost effective technology tools.
A Basic Social Media Plan For the Chamber Should Include the Following:
- A blog, which is the hub of an online presence
- Put out a blog post a minimum of once a week
- Presence on major social networking platforms, i.e., Facebook, Twitter, YouTube
- Allow for members to comment and post on those platforms
- Create a membership site for forums and discussions
- Have an intermediate level of understanding of Search Engine Optimization (SEO) for internet marketing
- Allow for members to post videos about their business on Chamber website and Chamber social networking platforms
- Weekly vlog (video blogging)
- Ongoing education and training for members on how to use the latest technology tools
- Annual Business Technology Conference for small business
Businesses and Organizations Are Much Like Technologies
The U.S. Chamber of Commerce has been in existence for almost 100 years. It’s hard to adapt when you are used to doing things a certain way for a long time. Change can be scary and yet it can be a good thing. Hosting a town hall meeting is a step in the right direction for the local chamber. Yesterday’s technologies were the PC and the internet. Today it is social media and internet marketing. Tomorrow will most likely be mobile and geo-location technologies. Businesses and organizations are much like technologies. They are dynamic and ever changing. They go through phases. Some survive, some thrive, while others are put to rest. They get birthed, mature, change, merge, or take on the appearance of a dinasour. What is most obvious in today’s economy is that many small business owners are hanging on like a cat on a tin roof. Many resources are needed. Here are a few online sources as well as Nevada County Business sources that I hope you find useful. Feel free to add additional resources in the comments section.
- Sierra Commons (Nevada County Business incubator and co-working community)
- Nevada County Economic Resource Council
- Intuit (The Small Business United Blog)
- Small Biz Survival (A business blog for rural communities)
- Social Media Examiner (A guide to Social Media)
- Hubspot (Free online training for internet marketing)
- Nevada County New Business Network (Facebook Group)
- The Exchange (Facebook Biz Group for Western Nevada County)
Networking Should Never Be Dull
You’ve heard the saying, “People buy from people they know, like and trust.” Nothing builds trust in a relationship faster than a face-to-face interaction. As powerful as online networking is, there is nothing more magical than connecting with another human being in person. So, here are 10 TIPS on how to be a dynamic host at your very own networking event:
1. Have a designated greeter at the entrance. It’s just plain good manners to welcome people at your event.
2. Use name tags. If it is an event where most people have only met online or don’t know each other, please offer name tags. Most people are not good with remembering names, especially if they are meeting a lot of people for the first time.
3. Be a connector by introducing people to one another. Many people are not naturally comfortable going up to someone and introducing themselves. It was a big deal for them to actually show up. So, make it easy for people to engage in conversation with one another by introducing them to each other.
4. Keep announcements to a minimum. People came to network. They don’t want to listen to a speech.
5. Say good-bye to your ego. It’s not about impressing your guests. It’s about making your guests feel welcomed and comfortable.
6. Don’t be a Poser. In other words, don’t pretend to be someone or something you are not. People can detect a lack of authenticity immediately and it is a big turn-off.
7. Be courteous. Duh! Yes, I feel the need to state the obvious because I am amazed at how people don’t seem to be conscious of their lack of consideration for their guests. Being courteous is really about being considerate. It’s about anticipating the needs of your guests and making sure those needs are being met. Upon arrival for example, be proactive and point out where the restrooms are or any other important information.
8. Don’t talk adnauseam about yourself, your kids, or your pets. Nobody really cares. Unless you are talking to someone who genuinely does, (you will know because they will keep asking questions) don’t do it. Networking is inherently designed to have a dialogue not a monologue. So, ask questions. It’s about sharing in a conversation.
9. Be present. If someone interrupts you (which we all know is rude) while you are talking to someone else, the temptation is to turn your attention to the interruptor. Don’t leave your initial conversation and start another conversation with the interruptor. Just turn to the interruptor and say, “As soon as I am done talking to (say person’s name) I will be available.” Then quickly turn away and give your attention back to the person you were talking to and finish the conversation. This is a hard one and takes practice, because we naturally want to please everyone who wants our attention. It requires being fully present and grounded in the moment so that you are not easily distracted. When you drop a conversation and divert your attention to another conversation without finishing it, you are in essence saying, “You are not important to me. I don’t care about you.” Is that the impression you want to give to your guests?
10. Follow-up. Be sure to follow-up with your guests/attendees and ask them to comment on their overall experience, especially if it is going to be an ongoing scheduled event. Feedback is critical to the overall success of your ongoing events.
You’ve heard the other saying, “People may forget what you said or what you did, but they will never forget how YOU made them FEEL.” Everyone wants to feel special, especially your guests. Why do you think Oprah has guests that are CRAZY about her show? She knows how to make them feel special.
Do you have a networking tip to share? Feel free to add any other networking tips on the comments below. We can all learn from one another.

CEO of Twitter, Ev Williams & Brenda Tello Horton of Hware at South By Southwest Conference in Austin Tx March 2010
Twitter is the Reason I Fell In Love with Technology
I LOVE smart men! I married one 13 years ago. We’ve been together for almost 20 years now. While at the South By Southwest Interactive Media conference in Austin Texas, I was surrounded by thousands of cool, smart and geeky men. By far they outnumbered the female attendees. And, being that my husband is also my business partner, I felt right at home networking with these hip, creative, and gadget-loving guys. So naturally, when I saw Ev Williams, CEO of Twitter walking by me on Congress Avenue, it felt effortless for me to introduce myself to him. After all, Twitter is the reason I fell in love with technology, the internet, social media, video blogging, and the online world of social networking. Prior to Twitter, my usage of the internet involved buying airline tickets a few times a year and an occasional book purchase from Amazon. Okay, I used my computer a bit more than that. The point is that Twitter radically changed the way I interact with technology, my computer, and the internet. One October day in 2008 I attended BizTechDay, a conference in San Francisco and everyone was talking about Twitter, blogging, WordPress, and social media. These buzz words were practically in every conversation during the break-out sessions and lectures. When I heard people talk about how they were experimenting with Twitter to grow their business, I focused in more intently. The ease and simplicity of it immediately intrigued me. Online business networking was something I could definitely wrap my brain around and Twitter seemed to be the technology tool to help me get started.
Top 7 Reasons why I LOVE Twitter
Fast-forward eighteen months later and here I am, a social media power user, small business blogger, technophobe-turned-technolovah! It was great chatting with Ev. I thanked him for bringing Twitter to market. I use it everyday for business and cannot imagine working without it. Here our my TOP 7 reasons why I LOVE Twitter so much:
- I can link my favorite blogger’s posts to Twitter and share it with my followers. I use a tool called Twitterfeed
- Anyone can easily find me on Twitter and instantly get a sense if they want to follow me or not and vice-versa
- Real time updates and trending topics (faster than Google)
- Can tweet from my SmartPhone
- Share photos
- Brevity (only 140 characters)
- Have access to brilliant people from all over the world
Twitter is a very powerful tool. It can be used as a marketing tool, a relationship builder, and connector tool. There were business tools before Twitter and there will be business tools after Twitter. Chuck, my biz partner likes to remind me that before Twitter, there were Bulletin Boards. Any Geeks out there remember the Bulletin Boards in the 80s? How about you? If you are a Twitter Lover, what are some of your favorite reasons for using Twitter? How are you using Twitter to grow your business? If you are not using Twitter for business, why not? Please share your comments. In my next post, I will write about my full experience at South By Southwest.
SXSW is like Burning Man with Laptops and Bathrooms
I am attending SXSW for the first time this year. If you have never heard of SXSW, it is one of the largest film, music, and media conferences in the world. Held every year in March in Austin Texas, it’s been described as Burning Man with laptops and bathrooms. I am attending the interactive media segment, which lasts for five days. I am so excited to meet some of the business and social media bloggers, thought leaders, and best-selling technology authors I have been following for over eighteen months now. I am ecstatic to see and hear some of the key-note speakers like Ev Williams, CEO of Twitter. I feel like a kid riding my bike without my hands on the handle bar…HAPPY! For the last year and a half, I have immersed myself in social media, internet marketing, SEO, and learning online software tools, all for the purpose of growing my own company’s presence online. In my former life, I was an outside sales person. Today, I sit in front of a computer connecting with the online world. And, surprisingly I’ve realized that I have a knack for it. Perhaps that is why Hewlett Packard contacted me a few weeks ago and asked me to review their new HP iPAQ Glisten SmartPhone, which I am giving away on March 17th. Perhaps that is why oftentimes, I have to peel myself away from my computer, even though I have been in front of it for 16 hours. I know it sounds obsessive and unhealthy. I am working on finding that balance. But, the point is that who would have thought a non-techy gal like me has found LOVE and PASSION for internet technology! I have transitioned from an off-line business model to an online business model and now I am going to meet the very people whose content and guidance I have used to help me make that transistion.
What is Your ROI Formula for Attending Conferences?
There are literally a gazillion conferences to choose from and obviously a small business owner cannot attend every single one. So, how does a small business owner choose the best conference for their specific needs? It starts with the ROI (Return on Investment). Simply put, the ROI is the amount of time, money, resources, opportunity costs, you put into attending the event (which is the investment). After you add up all those expenses, costs, etc., you then subtract it from your return or your gain. Whatever amount is left is your ROI. Recently, I got into a fairly big discussion with my biz partner, Chuck on this very subject. He is the left-brain of our business and I am the right-brain. He wanted to tie the ROI of my time spent at SXSW to the sell of a product. I wanted to tie the ROI to the networking, relationship building, as well as the sell of a product. In other words, I should gain not only social equity from SXSW, but financial gain as well. In addition, that gain should be tied to a specific timeline. In a future post, I will give you specific examples of the ROI formula I used for attending SXSW. In the meantime, here is my question for you. How do you measure your ROI when attending conferences? I think it is hard to measure relationship building because you are not always sure how that relationship is going to evolve. The sell of a product or service is much easier to measure, but honestly, that’s never the main reason why I like to attend conferences. Everyone has their various reasons for attending a conference. Authors attend to promote their book. Speakers attend to gain more exposure. Companies attend to expand their brand. Attendees attend to learn, network, and build prospective strategic alliances. What are your reasons and how do you justify your investment? Please leave your comments on my post! Thanks!
I SEE YOU
There’s no doubt that the movie Avatar has captured the imagination of millions. So what does a Hollywood film have to do with business owners? Three words: I SEE YOU. In the movie, Neytiri of Pandora looks straight into Sully’s eyes and says to him, “I see you.” Three simple words, yet such profound meaning. Now think about that for a moment. Imagine taking the time to say that to our customers, our vendors, our employees, our subscribers, and our partners. My observations and life experiences lead me to believe that people have a desire to be acknowledged and treated with dignity and respect. Once you understand that, then you are in a position to better SERVE the people around you whether it be employees or customers. I realize that sounds so obvious, but I am amazed at how oftentimes, businesses just don’t seem to care. By saying, I see you, Neytiri acknowledged Sully, she validated him, and she showed him that she cared.
I see you means so much more than its literal connotation. It means:
- I am listening to you, Partners, Affiliates and Vendors
- I understand your needs and wants Mrs. Customer
- How can I empower you, Employees
- How can I help you Fans, Followers, Friends
- How can I support you, Subscribers to my blog
- What can I do to serve you, Database of Prospective Buyers
- How can I thank you, Donors
I See You is about the Platinum Rule
Ultimately, I see you means, I am here for you . I care about you. It’s about understanding the needs and wants of the people around you. I see you is more than the Golden Rule — Treat Others the way YOU want to be treated. I see you is about the Platinum Rule — Treat others the way THEY want to be treated. Now, you might say that giving everyone the customized attention and care of the Platinum Rule is not cost effective or realistic, but what I would encourage you to think about is how you can better understand the people around you that help make your business successful. It’s a known fact that people do business with people who they know, like, and trust. What are you doing to see the people around you so that they rave about your products and services and refer more business your way? How are you showing them that you care? If you are having a hard time answering these questions, then it’s time to ask them whether it be your employees or customers. I recommend using survey monkey, an online survey tool. By surveying your team, customers, etc., you will get the feedback you need to guide you in the right direction. Lastly, unfortunately, this lack of caring does not seem to discriminate, whether it be big business or small business. Here is a perfect example of someone who felt like his airline did not “See Him.”
Reminder: Just 9 more days left to win an HP iPAQ Glisten SmartPhone.
Are You Forgetting to Take a BREAK?
When We Are Healthy We Can Take on the World.
So How Do you Fit it in and Make it Work While Running a Business?
A few quick tips:
- Use your scheduling tool of choice and make an appointment with yourself. Blocking off even 30 minutes per day for physical activity can make a big difference. Treat the appointment just as you would one with a client.
- Cook in bulk. Make casseroles and soups with 6-8 servings and freeze for quick meals.
- Plan your health and fitness strategy just like you plan your business strategy. List out your goals and the objectives to achieve them. Develop a strategic plan at the day, week and month level.
- Use tools to work smarter not harder. There are iPhone apps to get nutrition information, online fitness communities for support and even healthy meal services to bring good food to you.
- Just like anything worth having in life, being healthy and fit takes work. It is work worthwhile, just like all those other aspects of your business you spend hours on. So before you think that health and fitness isn’t a priority to growing a successful business ask yourself this question. What would happen to your business without you?
















